What Makes Me Stand Out?

I always wonder what I'm good at, what makes me stand out, and what skill distinguishes me from others. I've always felt insecure about never having an answer to that question. I dig deep into my personality, but I've never found a definitive answer.

This wasn't always the case. In my childhood, I was always a standout kid, sometimes for specific reasons and sometimes not: smart, always at the top of my class, always first in sports. I used to finish in the top two in almost everything I participated in.

As I grew up, the things that made me the best gradually became overshadowed when I started trying to be like other teenagers. I didn't have what they had, so I unconsciously began sacrificing my studies and everything else just to be included in their bubble. Looking at myself now, I'm neither in that bubble nor the person I used to be. I'm lost somewhere in between, closer to their bubble.

Trying to pick up so many different things has left me empty. I notice a difference when I talk about maths with my friends or do quick calculations. I'm a bit agile, a bit athletic, and have some problem-solving ability. That's about it.

Each of my friends, or the people I socialise with, leaves an impression. I don't think I do, apart from the negative aspects, of course. I guess it's a matter of perspective. I'm so used to myself and my qualities that I might not realise I'm good at something. Others might notice something in me that I don't see.

But I never get praised for anything specific, just small, ordinary things. It's just a coping mechanism that helps me accept that I have nothing to bring to the table.